Best Day Ever
by ShelbyElizabeth
Summary: The team has to take a picture for the NCIS charity calendar, and someone's jealous. Written for NFA What Happened Here? Challenge. Crack!fic, please do not take this too seriously. You may have to go to NFA to see the picture and understand the situation


They were in a room, crammed to one side. Across from them was all of the equipment necessary for the day. Large boxes were spaced around a large camera, presumably containing roll after roll of film. Abby observed all of the equipment, as it was her nature to analyze things with which she was not familiar. Her eyes widened; she thought she had just seen something move. She was about to bring it up, but she was interrupted.

"This is ridiculous! We are wasting our time; we could be finishing our paperwork so that we do not have to stay late tonight. I have plans, and I really do not want to spend any more time here tonight than is necessary," Ziva whined.

"Officer David, if I hear one more word about how you don't want to be here, I will send you back to Israel. Is that understood?" Director Vance threatened.

Ziva slumped against the wall, pouting. "Ziva!" Abby yelled, "Don't slouch; you'll mess up your hair!"

Ziva waited until Director Vance had turned his back and flashed Abby a very unladylike hand signal. "Gibbs!" Abby screeched.

"Do that again, Ziva, and I will cut off that finger," he growled.

Ziva rolled her eyes. Tony made a face at her behind Gibbs' back. "Tony, you are very lucky that I left all of my weapons at my desk," she hissed.

Tony did not reply. "Children, I work with children," scoffed McGee.

"You know Timothy," Ducky began in his loud, clear voice, "A lot can be learned from the young people of this great nation. Sure, some of them are typical youths, but many of them are quite intelligent, and have minds less shrouded than their older counterparts."

"Listen Ducky, that's great, but can you all stop talking so that we can get this over with?" Gibbs looked even grumpier than usual.

They were all on edge that day. They were shooting a photo for the annual NCIS charity calendar. "Gibbs, the photographer isn't even here yet," Tim pointed out.

Gibbs stared at him. "Sorry boss, shutting up," Tim shrunk into the background.

"Tony! Don't touch Ziva's hair! It took me forever to do that!" Abby swatted Tony's hand away.

"You are really pushing your luck today DiNozzo," Ziva squinted at him.

"Ziva, Ziva, Ziva- I was merely readjusting it so that we can see your pretty face," he mocked in a cooing fashion.

"I do not care!" she snapped, "If you touch me one more time, I will impale you with Abby's stiletto."

Director Vance shifted towards the door. "I'm going to go get the photographer. Can you all stay here and try not to kill each other?" he stared pointedly at Ziva and Tony.

Nobody answered him, so he left, closing the door behind him.

PING! Something whizzed past Tony's head. "What the hell was that?" he asked, looking around wildly.

Everyone turned to him. "What are you talking about Tony? Nothing happened," McGee sounded exasperated.

Tony was about to retort, but Gibbs interrupted him. "The next person who speaks is going to be smacked so hard that they temporarily lose vision. Anyone who speaks after them permanently loses theirs. Got it?"

They all nodded.

PING! Something else shot past Abby. She jumped, grasping Gibbs' arm tightly. "Yes Abby?"

"Something just passed me. I felt it move."

Gibbs looked behind her. Sure enough, a small pebble was lying on the floor. He picked it up and held it to the light. "Who threw this?"

Tony looked under his chair, finding another pebble. He grabbed it and held it out to Gibbs, clenching his mouth shut so that he would not accidentally speak and get consequently slapped by Gibbs. "What is this DiNozzo?" Gibbs stretched out his palm and examined the stone before looking at Tony.

He pointed underneath his seat and to the pebble, trying to communicate what had happened. "Spit it out DiNozzo; you're not a damn mime," Gibbs smacked him on the back of the head.

"Right, sorry boss. I was trying to avoid getting hit, which just happened to me anyway. Um, it was under my chair, and I think that's what I felt zing past me a minute ago."

PING! CRASH! A third pebble came zooming toward the group, this time colliding with the flower vase in the middle of their setup. The vase shattered into large pieces; the roses that it had contained spilled out onto the table and floor. "What the hell?" Gibbs shouted.

He left his position and went over to the photographer's equipment, surveying every spot where someone could be hiding. When he reached a particularly large box, he reached behind it, grabbed something, and pulled it up into view of the other.

"Mr. Palmer, what are you doing here?" Ducky took a step forward.

Jimmy looked sheepish, and tried to subtly slip his slingshot into his pocket. "Jimmy!" Abby yelled, "You could have hit me in the eye with that!" she marched over to him and got in his face. "What were you thinking?

"I um… well, you all were up here, getting your pictures taken and I was down in autopsy by myself. It… it always feels like I get shunted aside. I'm just the autopsy gremlin to you," Jimmy's lip quivered, he looked as though he may cry.

Everybody watched as Abby's expression softened and she pulled Jimmy into a tight hug. "Oh, Jimster, you are not just an autopsy gremlin. You're a part of the team! You were the only one lucky enough to escape our fate. None of us actually want to be here," she let go of him and went back to her spot.

"Mr. Palmer, we would be glad to have you in the photograph, but we do not have anything else for you to wear," Ducky gestured to Jimmy's scrubs.

Vance burst back into the room. "The photographer isn't coming. We'll need to find someone else to take the picture," his eyes fell on Jimmy, "Ah, you'll do nicely."

He grasped Jimmy by the shoulders and forced him behind the camera. He quickly took his spot and the group froze in their positions. "Give us a countdown now," Vance commanded.

"Three… two… one," Jimmy clicked the button and the camera snapped, a bright flash temporarily blinding all of those on the other side it.

"Thank you Mr. Palmer," Ducky said loudly.

Gibbs' cell phone rang in his pocket. "Yeah, Gibbs," he answered.

A moment later he hung up the phone. "Gear up! Dead Marine in front of the Capital Building," he called to his team.

Everyone rushed out of the room to change and get back to work, leaving Jimmy standing alone by the camera. "Wow," he said to himself, "A part of the team," he left the room, feeling a rare sense of belonging.

He was smiling goofily for the rest of the day. When he finally left for the night, he couldn't help but think "Best day ever."


End file.
